Friday, October 9, 2009

.Another Chapter And Page.

I love how you're always trying to get my attention ; I love your lame jokes ; I love how you love making me laugh ; I love how you always look at me with that look of yours ; I love how your hand fits in mine ; I love how your smile sends shivers down my spine ; I love how your laughs lift my mood ; I love how you answer me when I call for you ; I love how you glance back and answered knowingly I didnt really have anything to say, but you said "yes?" anyway ; I love how you're not annoyed that I am trying my best to annoy you ; I love it when you love the things that I do for you, without me realizing im doing anything at all ; I love your bear-hugs! ; I love how you're trying to grow up for me, but failing miserably ; there are a million other things that I could write, and it would take days. So this is it --- for now. :)

I first saw you in the hall, with our different coloured painted faces. You were in the Red team, and I was in the Blue team. When we did our cheer you got up -- the only person in your team that stood up --, looked over and said, "Whateverrr." Seriously I could have smacked your head at that time. I called you The Whatever Guy, and I disliked you from then on. I looked at you as a spoilt kid, you looked like one anyway. I dismissed you, and moved on with my life. We even went to the same after-orientation-night thingy, but we didnt even realized each other. I left early. Then when classes started, I only had friends that are not in the same course as me. One invited me to lunch, and I accepted. Supposedly I was suppose to meet her earlier that day, but I was too busy. I was sleeping and I was grouchy, but I went anyway because I had a class to go to after the meet. And there, I met you again. How convenient.. You were sitting right across from me. I wasnt in the mood, so I reluctantly answered your questions. You asked for my number, I asked what it was for -- and you answered, "So if there's anything, it's easier to contact." So that was it. You texted me that night, but I ignored you. Then we met up for movies and some sight-seeing that night. I was the odd one out. So I kept mostly to myself. You sent me back home I think. It was very sweet of you. It's a gesture I'd have to say, no one has ever shown to me before.

It was your first time riding the bus back to KL. You were with our friends and you werent too happy about it. When you boarded the bus, it happened so quick that there wasnt much time to say goodbye. You sent a text that was not supposed to be read by me, you were telling our friend that if she brought me to see some other guys then she'll be in trouble. *laughs*

Since then, things have changed alot. Progressed, as some might say. There were some ups and downs. You told me you loved me, and asked me to say it back. But I wouldnt, and you said you'd wait. Something tragic happened, you had to go back to KJ. We were in the car, in front of Ixora. You were sad. I told you to take care of yourself, and you told me to do the same thing. Before you opened the car-door and walked away, you kissed my cheek. It was so sudden. I didnt react. I just sat there. I looked at you, but you're already walking away. So,I drove back home.

The first time I said I loved you -- was something that I didnt plan. It was supposed to be well-planned. Even if I was falling for you, I didnt want to immediately say it. I wanted to wait. But it happened anyway. Still, it is a beautiful memory. You drove back to Ixora, and I was eating ice cream. We changed seats and you were waiting for me to finish my ice cream before going out of the car. I said it was OK, as I was finishing it anyway. You said, "Bye, I love you " and opened the passenger's seat door. Without realizing it, I answered "Bye, love you." I didnt even realized it until you shut the door closed and stared at me in disbelief. I hid my face as I rested my head on the steering wheel, I couldnt even look at you. I did not believe I just said it. So un-romantic of me! You opened the door again and said it again, I think hoping that I would answer you again. But I didnt, and so you walked away. I received a text from you that says, "You what??" I said nothing. And that was that.

I still remember this particular day like it was yesterday. I had dance practice, and you were suppose to come. You texted saying that you were tired from the soccer game, so you're not coming. I was disappointed, but I understood. Adlin and Liyana wanted to borrow the car, so I passed them the carkeys. After the practice finished, I tried contacting you, but you werent answering my calls and you werent replying my texts. I got annoyed, since we always go to dinner after my practices. And everyone seems to have plans, so I was alone. I walked out of the Block B building to find my car, since Adlin texted me saying that they're already waiting. I was still waiting for you to answer my call when I spotted the familiar Blue Kelisa parked nearby. I expected for the girls to come out, but there you were standing with a pink shirt. A rose in hand and a big smile plastered on your face. I was in your grey hoodie and a cap and definitely messy. I hated you for picking that moment to be all romantic. HAHA. Couldnt you pick some other time when I look more decent? Ok, moving on.

I shouted something while walking towards you, but halted when I saw the rose and when it sunk in that you were going to propose. I laughed and told you I wasnt going to come any closer. You waited patiently until I did. I was standing in front of you when you handed me a little card that says Love Bug in front of it, with a picture of a ladybug. Inside you wrote "Fatin Aqilah, will you be my girlfriend?" The only reaction I could give to you at those times was laughing. Sorry, I laugh when I cannot think of what other thing to do. I said, "No," and pretended to walk away. You made a face, and I stayed. You asked me again, and I told you, "Of course." You went down on one knee and handed me the rose. You opened the passenger door and we drove back home. I got ready as you waited and we went for a late dinner since practice always ends around 10pm. You brought me to D'Pelican, you asked me if I know why. But I didnt. You said it was because there was a time when we went there before a movie and you were upset because I told a friend that I wasnt that interested in you. You said you really liked me at the time but I didnt feel the same way, so since then you promised yourself that you'd try your best to win my heart. And when you finally did, to pay tribute to that day, you brought me there for our first dinner together as a couple. You paid for dinner, even when I insisted on going Dutch. :) Then we were off to McD for ice creams. That was like our late night ritual, we'd hang out at McD. Just us. It was like our secret place. Haha!

Muhammad Asraf, I love you. I will learn to love you more and more for the days to come. It's a long journey, so walk with me.

So, until the next post.

Love, Aqi.

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